How to Fart in public and Retain your Image. Lol [MUST READ]

By 10:27 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 Comments

To mess for public dey sweet but if dem catch u, no be small embarasment o! Just follow dis guidelines & u are on ur way to being a star in dis profession.

1. Wen u enter a hall, check d wind direction, if na closed hall wit AC, better. Maximum impact.

2. Make sure say u sidon face d wind direction. …

3. Make sure say u get enof leg space. U go soon knw why.

4. Form ajebo by crossin ur legs every now & then.

5. U don ready 2 execute, try hold am until time wey d hall dey noisy incase ur mess na d type wey dey sound like AK47.

6. Now carefuly cross ur leg, right over left.

7. Elevate d right yansh.

8. Release small (sound check)

9. If no sound, allow make d mess flow steady.

10. Allow time 4 proper circulation.


1. Make sure say no be u be d first person 2 complain.

2. Wen pple begin dey shout “chineke! E no go better for d person wey do dis kind thin, ” simply ask “why person no fit respect d presence of odas na?”

3. No hala pass odas if not u go become suspect.

4. Take style disengage from the area, relocate to another zone and repeat the exercise!


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